In some cases, we’re missing ourselves, the identity we had before we became parents or empty-nesters, widowers, divorcees or orphans. We’re missing our friends whose own family obligations make it harder to spend time together. We’re missing a sense of connection with growing children or grandchildren, who used to be thrilled to have a new toy and now only want gift cards or cash. We’re missing our own economic power, our ability to provide our families with the kind of holiday we think they deserve.

We’re missing loved ones who can’t be with us because of their health or our health or the general health of the world. We’re missing family members who have died or slipped away into addiction or dementia or estrangement. But just as rational people don’t depend on vitamins alone to cure chronic disease, we shouldn’t expect #Gratitude to fix everything wrong with the holidays.īecause alongside our gratitude for everything we have, this is the time of year many of us are most aware of what’s missing. It’s proven to help your mood and resiliency. Gratitude is like Vitamin D - we all need it, especially in these cold and dark winter months. A picture of a perfect table on your Instagram feed. Gratitude for family, for wealth, for a warm hearth and happy home. If you’re taking cues from retailers, the expectations only seem to grow annually. A perfect holiday season might be one with all of the love and none of the expectations, but few of us have managed to pull that off. It’s all of those things in equal measure, because you’re either surrounded by family, with all of their love and expectations or you’re not. It’s a season that kicks off earlier every year, with Halloween the summit of a greased slide that ends in insolvency and indigestion.Īnd it’s wonderful.

For some of us, it’s a marathon of shopping and eating and parties and clean-up and cards and child-managing and relative-managing and more shopping and more eating and more clean-up. What do you call this time of year? For decades we’ve referred to the stretch between the last two weeks of November and first week of January as “the Holidays,” a term that encompasses celebrations of all faiths as well as the secular event of Thanksgiving. And if you do know, you’ve probably already skipped this intro to get to the good stuff, her writing: If you don’t know this homegrown writer’s work, we’re betting you’ll soon come to look forward to every column. Linda Stansberry provides a column for Redheaded Blackbelt once per month.

Happy tree friends slap